I had these two sweet babies that went down to sleep nicely, mostly slept through the night besides sometimes needing a soother and everything was good in the world. We had a small hiccup when we had to stop swaddling because they could roll over, but we bounced back! Then another small hiccup when we moved them from their bassinets in our bedroom to cribs in their own room, again, SUCCESS. Disney music played through our life as we got stretches of sleep that lasted HOURS and we just with so much confidence felt like we had figured our children out, master parents. These precious angel babies…. WHERE DID THEY GO.
This is day 3 now of having basically zero sleep except in 30-40 minute increments every once in a while. I’ve read plenty about the 8 month sleep regression and let me tell you what, reading about it is vastly different from experiencing the devastating frustration for yourself. I’ve had plenty of moments where I’ve thought “huh, so I’m totally unqualified for this job and have no idea what I’m doing…. and they’re just going to scream cry at my face because I don’t know how to fix the problem, and they don’t know what the problem is, I don’t know what the problem is and EVERYONE IS MAD ABOUT IT”.
There’s only so many times you can try to force tiny humans that are exhausted to go to sleep before you go clinically insane. I don’t know what I’m doing and if you came here looking for solutions to the problem, I DON’T HAVE ANY. So instead, here are some ways to spend your time when it’s 3AM and all you truly want to do is get in your vehicle and drive away from your home (I mean, you’d come back…probably).
cry forcefully about how you’ve absolutely lost control of your broken children and you obviously lied on your resume in order to get this job you’re clearly not prepared to have
Tell your partner it’s “their turn” as many times as you possibly can until you’ve propelled them also into a deep rage. Misery loves company.
Go into your bathroom stare deep into your dead sleep deprived eyes and contemplate your whole existence
Keep reminding yourself that everything is temporary, this night will end, this phase will end, one day they’ll sleep and you’ll sleep and the Disney music of your life will return.